November 29, 2021 - Monday


It feels so strange that the year is coming to an end already. In just a couple of days, it will be the last month of 2021. 😳 And if I look back on those New Year's resolutions I blogged about on January 1st(ish), I doubt I've kept any of them. In some ways, 2021 was even harder than 2020. I've been living with a constant anxiety about COVID, but unlike 2020, life is pretty much "back to normal" and I guess we're not supposed to let it affect us anymore. 🤷 The kids are back in school full time and, while it's nice to have these days with just Ollie, the morning rush sets the tone for the day...and that tone is usually, 'I don't have enough time; I'm too irritable; I'm failing my children; I have way too much to do.' And OLLIE. OMG. Ollie. She's just so challenging in so many ways. Ben and I are just functioning; certainly not thriving. And I find myself feeling sad almost constantly, even though I'm not always in periods of depression. I'm having a hard time finding the joy in Christmas right now...or even in everyday life. I have more blessings and things to be grateful for than I could possibly name, but I'm just bummed out. But have I been seeking joy or just wallowing in the stress of life? I know where my peace is, but I'm not truly making the effort to get it. 

"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you." Matthew 7:7



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