Photo Journal - Josie Boettcher

I think I’m going to do a combined blog for the last several days because they haven’t been interesting or full and I didn’t write on the ​actual  days, so I don’t even really remember the feelings or thoughts I was having.  Wednesday - It was a productive school day. My art assignments are going well, but I forgot to get the kids to look for books on Ohio, so we’re falling behind on Jonas and Clem’s research projects. We went to small group tonight and Ben really shared quite a bit. While I miss having in-depth teachings and I miss my friends, I am enjoying meeting with a group of people that all really want to be vulnerable and share their lives with each other. It’s refreshing, but I think I ​'ll always feel a little homesick for Ohio HC.  Thursday - We had a field trip to Lynd’s and did the tour, which was informative and a lot of fun. We have 1,000 apples now! I made apple pie for dessert for pizza and a movie night, but I’m still scared to make real crust, so I mad...

I woke up feeling a lot better this morning, but still just so, so tired. It had rained overnight, so I decided not to take the kids on the hike with W&F (although Anne tells me the path ended up not being muddy at all). I took the kids to the art museum instead, which was ok. We were only there for a half hour when Ollie started complaining about wanting to leave because she was so bored. We looked at some examples of Renaissance art and played in the kids space. We wandered around the hallways and the courtyard a bit, then headed home. Chick Fil A offered me free delivery today, so we took advantage of that and had it for lunch.  I'm starting to feel like I need something to do in the afternoons, productivity-wise. I'm getting so bored! The kids are super relieved to have some down time when they don't have school work and chores, but I'm just kind of floundering lately. I haven't been reading for the last week and I have no projects I'm working on. Maybe ...

We had a very successful school morning and I am so glad for it. I designed an art curriculum for the kids and I was a little nervous about getting it started! But I taught them the very, very basics of what the Italian Renaissance art period was and what characteristics paintings from that period might have. Later in the week, we'll do some Botticelli studies and the kids will emulate his paintings or draw something that his paintings inspire. Pretty fun! I don't expect them to remember every artist or even what the Italian Renaissance is, but it'll ring a bell in the future and that matters to me.  Other than school, we didn't do much today. I'm still not feeling great, so I mostly laid around. Clementine and Ruby went to dance class with their friends Penelope and Talulah and when they came home, they both desperately wanted to join! Sadly, my answer is no. I am not driving up to Westerville every Monday night for two hours. It's just not happening. Now I...

We visited Meadow Park church today, the first time we've been to a normal Sunday service there. It was weird. It was really nice that it's only 7 minutes away and it doesn't start until 10:30. It kind of feels like you have the whole morning still. But it's an odd feeling that nobody gets together and visits afterwards. Like, everybody just goes their own ways, now that they've put in their hour. Also, the praise and worship was terrible...so cringey! The kids all had such a great time, though. And, sadly, they usually don't have fun at Oasis. That makes me really sad.  I started feeling really sick after church, like fever, sore throat, headache, and fatigue. I ended up laying around for the rest of the day, but I'm pretty convinced I have COVID or something. If I'm still feeling bad in a day or two, I'll test.  I worked on my photo albums today, but didn't take any photos! I have this old one of Clem from one of our April lake visits. 

We didn't do much today. Ben worked most of the day and I didn't feel like taking the kids anywhere. Pretty boring Saturday! I'm feeling super, super pent up, but at the same time, can't imagine taking my pack of feral, fighting children out. I wish they would stop fighting so much. Ben and I took an hour to go out to the grocery store together, and that was actually really nice. We took our time, I got some Starbucks, and we caught up. We talked about the kids' behavior and decided together that we need to count much more often and discipline much more freely. We've both gotten to this place where we warn constantly, but rarely follow through. It's nice to have a plan! Even if it is a daunting one. 

School went really well today, but I'm not feeling awesome. I'm just bored, maybe? I'm not really sure what it is. I feel like I want to do something, but I don't actually want to get dressed or leave the house or put forth any effort whatsoever. *shrug* I took the kids to the library, and I created an art curriculum for us to use through the school year. We've been floundering with art and it's such an important subject to me, so this should give us some direction, at least. We'll do quick studies on artists and their works of art, then we'll imitate and/or use their art as inspiration for our own art through the week. It's something! I have a list of 40 artists, so we'll definitely have someone to study every week.  We went to the library after school and ran a few errands and then I made eggplant parmesan for dinner. I did not like the way my eggplant parm turned out at all. I was super disappointed that all of my efforts felt wasted! Jonas an...

Ben and I had a pretty big blowup yesterday, which ended up being good for us, and things are better now between us. I don't know that we were able to really figure out any solutions, but at least we were both able to reaffirm our commitment to one another and our willingness to try. We also each got a little perspective on the others' feelings, which is always important. I am the queen of assuming other people's motives, even though I'm often wrong. Hard to believe, I know.  We had co-op this morning and that was awesome, as always. I had to cover for the teacher in the guitar class, along with the other helper and it went more smoothly than we expected, I think. We had a bunch of technical difficulties with the TV in the classroom, but the kids were patient and kind to us while we tried to figure it all out. And for second period, which is a huge snooze fest, I got to miss the whole thing! I had a meeting with the board to work on planning when the yearbook committee ...

It's hump day! But, since it's the first day of the week we've actually been able to sit and do school work, it kind of feels like a Monday or, like, a catch up and cram everything in that I can day. And that is what we did! We crammed as much school work into the first half of the day as possible.  The truth is, I'm only blogging right now because I need to vent. I am so frustrated with Ben!! I don't know what to do. I'm getting to the point where I just want to pack up and get away from him for a while, which let's me know it may be time to talk to him soon. I've done that before and it was really unfair! It's not just his horrible moods and the fact that he explodes on the kids all the time without warning. It's not even that we got into our fight last week when he exploded on me over what felt like literally nothing, screaming and cussing at me in the Walmart parking lot. It's more about the fact that we are not on the same page at all. I...

Is it becoming a common theme that things aren't great with Ben? I think so. It's hard to talk to him about it, though, because he's really sensitive right now. And today is the anniversary of his mom's death, so I need to just give a little grace. I know he's not going to get what I'm talking about when I do bring it up anyway, which makes me want to avoid the conversation even more.  Today, we went to Wild & Free at Whetstone. It was a good morning. We got there just about on time and hung out for a couple of hours. I had really terrible cramps, so I was struggling a little, but the conversation and company couldn't be beat. I finally got some time to just catch up with Anne, and really appreciated that. I also got to talk to Claire for a while, who is struggling way worse than me. It's not good that she's in a hard spot in life, but it is good to get some perspective sometimes.  I didn't feel like cooking dinner today, because I had book c...

Back at it! I felt in pretty good spirits today, although stuff with Ben seems to be getting worse. I'm trying to just be upbeat, despite his dour, unhappy presence, bringing us all down. He's been in constant pain lately and his meds are making him act extremely emotional. So, in addition to his terrible moods, he's also weepy and feels angry at me for it, usually.  We had a field trip to the Airstream factory, which was so cool. It was an hour drive, which kind of sucked after that Maine drive, but it went by quickly and nobody complained, so it was all good. We had some of our good friends on the field trip with us and, of course, we are all now obsessed with Airstream, because they're the coolest campers of all time. We weren't allowed to take pictures during the tour, so I don't have many! Just lobby photos, really.  

I considered going to church at Meadow Park this morning, just for convenience, but poor Clem's poison ivy rash is SO BAD and she's so embarrassed. We just stayed home. Probably for the better, anyway, since I have a thousand loads of laundry to do.  Things are still weird and uncomfortable with Ben. He is super excited because his computer is working again, now that we're home, so he spent a bunch of time working today. Hooray for him, I guess? I just did laundry, cleaned, and hung out with the kids.  It is disappointing to have the noise of the TV back. It was so nice having the only background noise be the ocean. Now, we're back to bullcrap TV shows and constant radio. I wish Ben didn't need noise all the time. It hurts my brain!

We got out of the house at 6:45 this morning, just a little later than we had hoped. Packing up the car is just really hard. And, in this house, we have to bring all of our own bedding and stuff, and then make their beds with their bedspreads when we go to leave. Some years, it just doesn't feel worth it. Other years, it's like, what's the big deal? But I think when we're looking at a 14-hour (base) drive ahead of us, making all those beds first thing in the morning is a pretty big deal.  The drive today did go as well as could possibly be expected. Ben got sleepy and asked me to drive for a while, but, of course, I was also incredibly sleepy and kept being on the verge of nodding off myself! He didn't even nap while I was driving, so it felt like, why on earth did I even take a turn in the driver's seat? I'm just endangering my family here! Anyway, that was the only turn I took. He did the rest of the drive. Nobody really complained or anything and we got b...

Today was spent packing up at the house. We did head down to Birch Point Beach for a little while, but then something gross happened to Clem in the public restroom (someone else's accident became her problem!) and we had to leave ASAP. It was beautiful there though. She and Ben ended up walking home, which, thankfully, was only a mile. Packing is terrible. I wish I could never do it again. Just throw it all away and start over new!

I'm starting to get to the point where I'm a teensy bit burnt out from activities. I kind of want to just stay home and read by the ocean and stop doing stuff. Today was me and Ben's big date day. Ruby and Clem spent the night at dad and MJs camper last night, so we dropped off the other two after breakfast. Then we went...basically nowhere. Ben had a terrible headache, which prevented us from doing much. We went to a quick lunch at a sub-par restaurant, walked through a farmer's market in 2 minutes, then drove home so he could rest. We had a little intimate time once his headache subsided a bit ;), then went out to make a couple of quick stops before our movie. We got to the theater and decided, last minute, that we just didn't feel like going to the movies. We felt like being with our family. So, I called MJ and figured out what their plans were so we could meet them, but then we got into a huge argument about nothing. We fought for the next couple of hours over a...

We had another pretty chill morning today, at the house. I decided to take all of the girls for rides out on Aunt Evie's kayak too, which was really fun. I was so worried I'd be exhausted, but it was fine! We all had fun times paddling around the bay.  After our kayak rides, we had some lunch and then went into Camden for a little shopping. Camden is just so overwhelming, though. There are pretty constant crowds and it's very difficult to find parking usually. Luckily for us, I found a great spot almost instantly! We met up with Marme, dad, and Ev, and then did some shopping. I was DONE with the crowds and the spending pretty quickly, honestly. We decided to take a break for ice cream and got everyone a scoop. The girls got so messy that Aunt Evie actually told them they couldn't sit next to her anymore because she was wearing white. 😅 I'll have to remind her of this if she ever has kids. :)  We came back home and did another photo shoot in the afternoon - the pira...

Another fantastic day in Maine!! This really is my favorite place on earth. If it weren't still 8 hours from family, we'd consider moving here. But who knows what life will look like in 20 years. Maybe we'll be rich enough to have a vacation home here that we can come to whenever we want. It doesn't seem likely! But I suppose it's possible. I can dream, anyway.  We spent the morning at home (seems to be a theme for us) and then headed to Pemaquid Lighthouse. I've never been there (that I can remember) and the rocks were some of the coolest I have ever seen in my entire life. Just breathtaking! We walked around and explored there for a little while and waited for dad and MJ to get to the lighthouse. We eventually meandered into the cool, little museum and then walked up into the lighthouse. Quite the narrow climb! Ben was pretty sour, because MJ acted like the lighthouse was on the way to Boothbay, but it really was just the same general direction. It was an hour...

We had a relaxing morning at home before heading over to Mt. Battie to climb up. I had the brilliant idea to avoid the park fees ($27 bucks!) and park at the trailhead entrance from a neighborhood. It really was brilliant...until we started hiking up. We were literally going on our hands and feet for more than half of the hike, it was so vertical. Jonas broke down crying twice and I was sure at one point that I would have to be airlifted out! 😅 Ben ended up leaving about 3/4 of the way through to get the car and meet us at the top, because we knew we would not be able to get back down this mountain. BUT we made it!!! We climbed a mountain and I'm super proud of us all. We took some good pictures and had some good laughs along the way. Memory building!  After the hike, we went into Rockland to the Grasshopper store and then got ice cream at DQ. We headed home after that. I was so dead from the climb that it made me super grumpy, sadly. It took a while for me to get back to normal. ...