May 24, 2025 - Saturday


I finished up the painting project today! I'm so happy with how it turned out. I think it looks adorable and it brings me joy. I also got a lot of the cleaning done that I wanted to get done AND got to go on a date with Ben and do some shopping. It was a good day! I'm so grateful that I'm getting some of my energy and motivation back. 

I talked with Ben at dinner about my loneliness. I know it hurts his feelings that he's not enough for me to never feel lonely, but I really miss having a best friend! I know it's selfish, but I want someone that is available to me whenever I want them to be! Or at least SOME of the time that I want them! I want someone that makes me laugh and makes me feel like they're not just squeezing me in or doing me a favor by spending time with me. I hate feeling like an obligation to people. Ben said he'd been wondering when I'd get back to feeling that way. And that makes me sad! That I'm so predictable! Ugh. And I do have MANY, MANY good friendships. I truly do! I have no real right to complain. I just want to have some fun with a friend, I think. My friendship cup is close empty right now. 

*The girls had a fashion show today and did their makeup and wore fancy dresses. I loved it so much!!!


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