December 26, 2025 - Friday



HAPPY BIRTHDAY, CLEMENTINE!!!! Man, we've had 12 years with this girl and what a blessing it has been. She wasn't the first to make me a mom, but having her taught me patience, and humility, and so much more. I had no idea who I was before her! It has been such a privilege to parent this beautiful, kind-hearted, relational, driven girl. I am so proud of her. She's courageous and tough, but also more than willing to feel ALL of those feelings! She prays and reads her Bible every night, on her own, without any prompting. I love her passion for the Lord and how self-motivated she is to do the right thing. She still challenges me and pushes me to be a more patient and humble woman, but I wouldn't have it any other way. 

Today was good, but also a little rough. Ben didn't sleep well and was feeling terrible today in a few different ways - emotionally and physically. It was hard to maintain the good mood and excitement when he was dragging and unhappy all day long. I thought to myself multiple times, 'What would happen if he were a single dad? If I died? Would he even do birthdays at all? He literally hasn't lifted a finger for her 12th birthday.' The thought just kept running through my head over and over. It made me really sad and a little frustrated with him. Like, parenting is tough for us all. It's not really fair to heap 98% of it onto my shoulders. And then my mind also went down the path of worrying about the kids' future relationship with a dad who checks out so much of the time that he's with them. Hopefully none of these thoughts are entirely accurate or reality. I just wanted today to be wonderful for Clem, and it wasn't. We did have some fun though! We took her to DQ for lunch (her choice!) and then we went to the skating rink in Grove City for a couple of hours. Ben even skated some! Clemi shone the whole time. She was SO excited to be there!! And Ollie won the dice game, out of all of the kids there! She was very excited too. Then we did some browsing at Target and I let all the girls put on sample makeup and perfume and browse the toy aisles while Ben waited in the car. 

In the evening, we had spaghetti and a lemon cheesecake pie (also Clem's request!). She had opened her presents in the morning and, while I wasn't sure it was a great idea, I'm kind of glad she did. By the time dinner rolled around, the stress of leaving for DE tomorrow morning also rolled around. I realized that I had a million things to do and just a few hours to do them. I did get everything done by the time Ruby and Ollie went to bed, but Clem felt neglected and sad that I had to rush around and be busy when she really still wanted my full attention. We have got to go to DE before Christmas next year. Rushing around after Christmas is for the birds. 




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