March 7, 2023 - Tuesday

Last night as a 3-year-old 😭

Tomorrow is Ollie's birthday! I got most of her birthday presents in December, when there were good sales, so, of course, I feel like I haven't done enough for her. đŸ¤ĻI'm just really struggling with my emotions lately. I thought I was coming out of my depression, and maybe I am?, but I'm just so sad and insecure right now. I'm not having all of my usual depression side effects, like irritability or fogginess, but I'm pretty bummed and feel like I'm kind of a worthless human. 

Annnnyyyyway. Ollie had school today, I worked, then we went to a play date pretty briefly up in Westerville. Brit was there and so was Alicia. It's been a few weeks since I've gotten to catch up on how Aaron is doing, so I spent most of my time talking to Alicia about how life has been. Lisa came for a few minutes too! I was very impressed that she got out of the house when her new one is only three weeks old. I should try and remember to be praying for her. She's feeling a lot of mom guilt about Jacob and how he's getting less attention. I know it's hard to let go of that. Of course, being removed from it quite a bit, I can say that it HAS to be that way. Babies need more than toddlers do...more of everything! Babies have to take priority. But that doesn't make it easier when you know that your first child's whole life has just changed overnight and not all of them handle the transition well. I also went and had my ultrasound done to see if there's anything weird going on internally to cause all of the heavy bleeding. I got the results back super quickly and they said that everything looks normal. It's just me! Hooray! Ben has his vasectomy scheduled for next week. :) We'll see if he finds a reason to cancel again!

It was nice that Ben didn't meet with Alex tonight. We really had a lot to do to prep for Ollie's bday tomorrow. We put together her new electric car. We thought it would be quick, but it took almost two hours! Then we needed to decorate, clean, and I had to make banana muffins. She asked for a strawberry cake for her birthday, and rather than making it myself, I'm going to get it from Golden Delight, where we got our wedding cake years ago. I hope she likes it! 



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