October 20, 2023 - Friday


We had the day off of school today and ended up barely doing anything! We took Ben’s car to the auto shop to get his brakes done first thing in the morning and then I hung out with Jenny for a little bit. We had midday plans with Shannon and Grace, but we were forced to cancel because of the crappy weather. I intermittently cleaned and relaxed for the entire day, really. I did get a big dinner ready and we had Aveen over for the night. After lots of hard work, nobody but Ben seemed to appreciate the food I made at all and, after dinner, I had just had enough. 

Feeling unappreciated, lonely, and disconnected from Ben has just gotten me so bummed out over these last couple weeks. I just grabbed my book and decided to go up to bed for the night when we finished eating. Ben kept texting while I was up there and eventually came up to talk. I finally got some things off my chest and it didn’t turn into a fight, so I’m feeling like it was a win. It’s just that after being with someone for this many years, it’s easy to take them for granted. We both do it and we both hate how it feels. I think we need something to refresh this marriage and our relationship. Ben agrees. We’ll see what we can come up with! But I’m feeling a little more hopeful and a lot less angry.

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