July 7, 2024 - Sunday

I feel like I'm just going through the motions lately, since I've been feeling so sick all the time. I got through CT this morning, but, for the first time, sat for 20 minutes of it. I just needed a break. I also have been feeling really sad about moving today. It's like, Ben and I made this decision, based off of how we felt God was leading us, and I just took it and ran with it, without stopping to feel too much. I've been afraid that if I let myself get caught up in emotions, I'd lose my nerve to go through with it. I can't even say how many times I've felt God leading me and have chickened out or allowed myself to let go of what I thought he was telling me to do because it was inconvenient (like this is) or painful (also like this is) or because Ben and I weren't on the same page. Praise God, we're on the same page with this. But he can be so capricious at times and I'm more afraid of him changing his mind than me. I'm afraid that planning this out a year in advance will result in us not following through with plans. I guess we'll have to wait and see what happens.

I met with Jenny today and we talked about our last conversation a bit. Things are better between us and I was glad for time to talk to her and hear her perspective. I have been really caught up in myself over the last month and a half +, so it was a good reminder that my friends also have feelings! 

I realized today that I had to add the shower nook thing in before I could do my next step towards tiling the shower. That was very frustrating, because I had to spackle in the edges and it's going to take forever to dry. I wish I had done this days ago! 

{Neither of these photos are from today. One was taken earlier in the week to document the horrors of sanding spackle and the other was from a day this week when the girls were caught in a surprise rain shower and were hiding out under trees to wait it out.}