April 19, 2024 - Friday


It's almost the weekend! I would say I can't wait, but mine is full of obligations, so I'm not all that excited. I think I need to be out of this Oasis coordinator role soon. I need a Sunday each month to rest, I think. Or to not have stressful plans on a Saturday, so that day can be rest? I need one of the weekend days and, lately, I've gotten neither. 

I met with Jenny this morning, for the first time in a while. I've been half avoiding church things and half having scheduling conflicts that have made it so we haven't gotten together, or even seen each other, really, in a long time. It was good. A little awkward at first, because I knew we had serious stuff to talk about today, but a huge relief after we talked. I don't know if she's relieved or just further burdened! But I know that it felt good to talk, cry a little, and share some things that have been weighing me down. Also, I'm feeling more and more certain that I need to be back on depression meds. It's gotten hard to know what's hormonal/emotional imbalance and what's really real. I don't like that. It makes me feel crazy! 

Jonas had his first volleyball practice today and it went really well! He was super anxious going in, but by the time we left, he was happy and excited. So glad he loved it! Sadly, the meat I was going to cook for dinner was bad and I couldn't make it. I started panicking and Ben convinced me to just reschedule with the Browns. I feel terrible about it. I just don't want them to think I don't want to hang out, because I do! I just really was freaking out about money and time. I am grateful that the cancellation freed up my evening so that I was finally able to repot some of my bigger seedlings. 

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